It's so weird to be taken out of a routine. I feel like routines are something we hardly think about. We get up in the morning, and we are often times on auto-pilot as we get ready for work, which is why when something unexpected happens it tends to throw off our entire day. I had gotten into this comfortable routine when I started dating my boyfriend and up until he left for his training. When he did leave, the relationship was still quite new, but because we were so comfortable around each other from the beginning, getting into a routine came very naturally. When he left, it did feel like that routine shifted and it took a bit to get into a routine on my own.
It's weird to try to adopt a new routine when you know that the circumstances you're under are temporary. When you need to adopt a new routine after say, breaking up with someone, it's a little different. You know you need to get used to being on your own again and that eventually, that routine will morph. In my case, I learned how odd it is to temporarily adopt a new routine, just to have to hop back into your old one. You feel like it will be a seamless transition back into the old routine, but of course it never is.
The week leading up to Alex coming home, I almost felt a little nervous. I was so excited for him to be back, but a small part of me was a little bit anxious. We were apart for a longer period of time than we had been dating. Our relationship started like a firework. The connection was basically instant and we spent almost every day together up until he left. We talked as much as we could while he was away, but of course that was so different. It was hard to have conversations without the occasional interruption or without our video chatting app glitching and missing parts of what the other said or having it totally crash mid-sentence. I was a little nervous that things wouldn't be like they were before he left and that some of that passion wouldn't make it back. I was also just nervous that the adjustment would be hard.
The first night he was back was a little bit harder. I hadn't shared my bed with anyone in two whole months. It was weird to have to share the space, not going to lie. I had gotten used to totally star-fishing and totally hogging the blankets and pillows. After that first night, it almost felt as though he had never left. Things just got back to normal pretty quick. My initial anxiety was just that; anxiety. Things did feel like they did before he left and we are just as smitten about each other as we were before he left.
Being back to what feels like my normal routine is just so nice. There's something so comforting about being around someone and things just feeling easy. It's lovely to just be able to cook dinner together, sit down to eat and chat about our days. Getting up together in the morning and getting ready for work while still half asleep is just really enjoyable. It's also nice to be able to just say "Hey, why don't we go out for dinner tonight." and having nice dates. I'm even just enjoying sitting on his bed writing this blog post, while he sits at his desk in front of me playing a game on his computer. It doesn't feel like we need to fill our time with special activities, because we know that we have lots of time to do the things we want to do and that he won't be needing to go anywhere any time soon.
Today, we started the day with a slow morning. I was awake at 7:30am and woke him up without meaning to. I went back to sleep until 9:30, which NEVER happens. He had been up for a while since he couldn't get back to sleep. We eventually ate cereal and got ready to go out to the spa. We spent the afternoon at Nordik Spa-Nature, in Chelsea, Quebec. Alex had never been, and I just love it there. It was such a nice way to unwind and hit pause on our busy lives. He was in great need of relaxation and self-care after being on this physically and mentally hard course. I had had an INSANE week at work, so the spa just sounded like a great idea. It was so nice to spend that time together without distractions or technology.
Getting thrown out of your routine is so tricky. Routines are nice to have, even when we don't even realize that what we do every day is a part of our routine. We definitely notice it when there is that huge change, like someone going away, getting a new job or adding something to our routine like going to the gym for example. It's so nice to be back to my normal routine. It feels right to spend time together and do the things we like to do, while still making time for each other. I know that being a military partner involves lots of adaptation and shuffling of routines. It's definitely not unusual for them to need to be away for a certain amount of time. This was the first time for us, so now at least we know what to expect and know that we are able to be apart and make it. Looking forward, I can just imagine that my "normal" will be the normal with him, and the normal by myself, and eventually both of those will feel alright. For now, I'm just enjoying this normal.